I Miss You
by Sakura aka L-sama no Miko
Summary: Tir (named Shin here) misses a certain blond manservant. I happened to find this forgotten fic on my USB while posting to AO3.


I Miss You A Gensou Suikoden Songfic By Sakura No matter what I do, inside my heart There are only things about you I miss you Shin McDohl stood at the window of his large room at the top of Torrent Castle. His thoughts weren t on the coming battle with Milich Oppenheimer. Instead they were on the only other person that mattered to him.  
Gremio had died protecting him while escaping from Soniere Prison with Dr. Luikan. He had ordered the blond man to open the heavy iron door, but for the first time in his life, his beloved manservant refused to obey. He remembered pounding on the door and yelling himself hoarse. Flik and the others with him had tried to calm the boy down, but it was in vain.  
Once he had gotten back to the castle that day, Shin went straight to his room and slumped onto the bed, crying himself into a fitful sleep.  
More than just playing childishly back in those days Our deep love was always maturing The black haired boy smiled sadly at a memory from only a few years ago.  
He d awaken from a terrifying nightmare one night. He d go to Ted s room, but he thought his newfound friend would think he was a wimp. So he crept to the only member of the McDohl household who wouldn t mind a late night visit.  
Not daring to make a sound, Shin climbed into Gremio s bed and wrapped his arms around the older man s waist. The blond stirred awake at the sudden extra warmth and a body snuggling close to him.  
"Y-young master?!" he stuttered, blinking at the boy in his bed. The boy looked up at him expectantly, silent tears staining his cheeks. "Did you have a bad dream, Master Shin?" Nodding, the black haired boy quickly wiped at his tears. Gremio moved the boy s hands aside and took out a handkerchief from the nightstand. "Here use this."  
"C-can I stay here, Gremio? Please?"  
The blond knew he should send the boy back to his room, but the maternal part of him told him otherwise. He had been taking care of the boy ever since he was born and considered him as his own son. But lately those feelings were becoming more than just parental now that Shin was approaching his midteens.  
Sighing, Gremio moved aside to make room for his young master. "Just this once, young master. You re not a little boy anymore."  
"I know," Shin replied. "It s just that "  
"Shh. Get some sleep, young master." The blond man held the boy in his arms and began stroking the soft hair. Shin wrapped his arms around Gremio once more and allowed himself to drift asleep.  
With only the prayers within my heart There are things I can t tell you "I should have told you," the black haired boy whispered, glancing at the Soul Eater on his right hand. "I should have told you how I felt about you, Gremio." Unbidden, tears began to fall onto the cold stone windowsill. "I loved you."  
There are times when love causes loneliness You must know that I can t be an adult Don t leave me alone anymore "Why did you leave me?!" Shin yelled to the sky, frightening some birds flying by. "Couldn t you see that I need you?! Why didn t you listen to me, Gremio?!" The tears refused to stop and the black haired boy put his head in his hands, sobbing uncontrollably. "I can t do this without you," he said between sobs.  
I can t replace the person that you love but I will always stay by your side And I will protect you Flik stood outside Shin s door, his heart breaking at the sobbing coming from within. He remembered his own pain when he lost Odessa. He could see what their new leader felt towards the blond man. In fact it was so much like what went on between him and the Liberation Army s former commander that tears threatened to fall from his own eyes.  
"Oh for Pete s sake!" the light brown haired man muttered to himself. He quietly opened the door not bothering to knock. "Shin I know how you feel, believe me."  
"Go away, Flik. I don t need this now," the boy said, his head pillowed by his arms on the windowsill.  
"Bullshit! Snap out of it, Shin! Do you think Gremio d want you to act like this after what he did to save you?"  
SMACK! Flik rubbed his sore cheek.  
"I know I deserved that, but you don t see me bawling my eyes out over Odessa do you?" Shin lowered his head, ashamed. "I miss her so much that you ve no idea how it hurts, but I m not going to let her death be in vain. I m going to try and live for her. That s what you should do too, Shin. Live for his sake."  
"Flik, I m sorry," the black haired boy said, crying tears of guilt and shame. "I shouldn t be crying like this but I can t stop myself."  
"Hey, it s ok. You re allowed to cry for a little while, just remember that you ve still got friends here."  
There are times when love causes loneliness Knowing that, do you understand how I love you?  
Now I feel alone close to you The Blue Lightning meant to comfort the boy by just holding him, but his lips accidentally brushed against Shin s forehead, startling him.  
"Flik?!"  
The slightly older man blushed, but in that instant realized just how lonely he was without Odessa. "It s ok, Shin. Let s be lonely together."  
Not knowing how to react to Flik s words, Shin just let the taller man s arms bring him closer and breathed in the sandalwood scent of his friend. He got another shock as the light brown haired man s lips brushed against his.  
Knowing the reason for Shin s tenseness, Flik pulled away and cupped one tear stained cheek. "I know you still love Gremio, Shin, but I want you to know that I ll be here for you too."  
Shin blushed, feeling guilty for betraying his beloved servant. "Thank you, Flik. You really are a good friend."  
Flik s heart broke. He had grown to love the courageous black haired boy over the past few months and now he d gone and wrecked everything by letting his body take control. "Y-you re welcome, Shin," he choked out.  
"Flik?" Shin was confused himself. He still loved Gremio, but was offered another chance at love with the Blue Lightning only to have Flik back out.  
"I shouldn t have done that. We re both on the rebound and things never work out in relationships like that." Flik had his hand on the doorknob, but the boy stopped him from leaving.  
"Don t go Flik," Shin begged, grasping his wrist, "I can t stand being alone anymore."  
That did it. Flik let go of the door and brought the black haired boy into another embrace. This time neither of them hesitated when their lips met, each drawing much needed love and comfort from the other.  
Flik smiled when he saw Shin s hand lock the door before going behind his hand and untying the blue bandanna.

~*~ Shin couldn t believe his eyes. The one he loved and lost so long ago had materialized in the castle s great hall. Gremio had been brought back by Leknaat s Gate rune and was just as confused as the Liberation Army s leader. However, that didn t stop the black haired boy from throwing himself at the blond and giving him an enormous hug. "I love you, Gremio!" he said not caring who was watching or listening.  
"Y-young m-master, what s going on? How did we get back here?" asked the blond manservant.  
Flik stood at the rear of the large hall watching those who knew Gremio rejoice at the blond man s return from death. A sad smile crept on his face. "I m glad for him actually," the light brown haired man said to no one in particular.  
"You gonna be ok?" Viktor asked after slipping away from the celebration. Even though Shin and Flik never told anyone of their relationship, the shaggy haired man was observant enough to notice what happened between the two. He also knew well enough not to say anything.  
"Yeah. I d had a feeling it d end between us. Just not so soon," his blue clad friend replied.  
"Maybe it s for the best. Sides I think those two are kinda cute," Viktor said with a chuckle. Their leader now had his hand around the blond s waist and, wasn t about to let the blushing and stammering Gremio out of his sight for an instant.  
"They are, aren t they?"  
Don t leave me alone anymore Later that night, Shin quietly left his room and managed to sneak into Gremio s down the hall. Gremio was about to go to sleep when the light from the hall drew his attention to the boy entering his room.  
"Y-young master? What s wrong?" he asked, getting a bit nervous. He still hadn t recovered from his sudden reappearance at the great hall.  
"Are you really here?" the boy asked, wrapping his arms around the blond.  
"Of course I am," he said holding him back. "Where else would I be, young master?"  
"This isn t a dream?" Shin so desperately wanted this to be real. He did love Flik, but if he had another chance with Gremio he would do everything he could to do things right.  
"I won t go anywhere," Gremio said remembering what the boy had told him about what happened at the prison and Leknaat, though he still didn t understand it all.  
"Promise?"  
"I promise, Shin," he whispered as the black haired boy pressed against his chest. "I ll never leave you again."  
"Good," Shin said before pulling the older man s head down and kissing him. Gremio blushed but let the boy continue to kiss him and lead him toward the bed. He knew deep down that this was what both needed at that moment, the reassurance that both were alive and loved.  
"Aishiteru," the younger boy whispered as he gently pushed the blond on to the bed.  
Gremio smiled, silently proud at the man his young charge had become. "I-I love you too, Shin," he replied before having his lips silenced once more.  
~Owari~ All C&C extremely welcome! 


End file.
